General > Except for the Pig
Small Animal News
Sindobook:
Yes, it is in the works.
The bunny brigade was mobilized a few days ago and sent north into that region. They are already there and have been a few days.
The small animals are pretty sure this is 'it', the cats in the area are engaged in a low intensity three faction battle that could blow up at any time. Some were asking for assistance so the brigade responded.
Samantha has sent back only one report, brief and to the point. "There isn't a single small animal left here that doesn't want to revolt. Morale is high, everyone is very motivated. They recognize that now is their best shot to taking back this area and driving out the cats for good."
Everyone is getting ready, they are getting the logistics set up, handing out carrots, getting their radios working, gnawing on wood[1], getting organized into respective companies and so on.
Really I expect it will only be a matter of time now.
[1] This is how a lot of small animals sharpen their teeth.
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Basically your standard burrowing and gnawing type of operation, that is my understanding at least.
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They aren't that uncommon, but they have their own ways of dealing with those guys.
From Mikey, "We know the type, they talk about how great of a fighter they are, how many cats they have killed or such but in reality, they haven't done a single thing. The best we can do with these guys is segregate them to their own unit, tell them they have been chosen for the most elite unit out there with others like them. We treat this unit like the cats treat their vangaurd, get them up there, front-and-center and out in the open. The first time a cat shows up, it would be funny if it weren't so [damned] predictable, these guys are whizzing all over the place, some freezing in place, others turning and running, etc. Quite a comical scene to watch, really."
Sindobook:
I don't know the answer to that. The gang is seriously weakened, and has had to seriously curtail expenditures.
The loyalist faction consists of Cat P and his followers, that is, Cat T, those in the Vanguard who are still loyal to him, and about half the mid-ranking cats in the organization. The revolutionary faction has no clear leader, but their members look up to Snake Z, the dispossessed Cat Y, and others like this. They have about the other half of the mid-ranking cats behind them, and the majority of the low-ranking cats. Cat K's faction has is led by Cat K and doesn't have many cats in the gang specifically behind him, but enough cats outside the gang and many within it at least look up to him.
For what it's worth, many of the animals in the revolutionary faction are small animal sympathizers, and have a loose alliance with the bunny brigade as they both want to unseat Cat P. The loyalists have made several attempts to launch an attack against the revolutionaries, but without any dedicated troops, these attempts have amounted to little more than 'hissing matches' where he and his minions get in attack posture, hiss menacingly, and make threats at known members of the revolutionary faction. When Cat P has tried to lead his minions into battle, they have all broken off, leaving him severely outnumbered and forced to retreat.
There's really not a huge amount of cats that are still active in the gang. In better times, the gang had around 700 cats but in its current state, their numbers have fallen significantly. In the prelude to the most recent 'hissing match', Cat P was only able to muster about 30 loyalist supporters to face off against roughly 50 revolutionaries. When it comes down to it, there are only about a hundred cats who the gang can claim as members right now. There are roughly 200 more on their lists, but these are 'members in name only' who aren't motivated enough to actually do anything for the gang or participate in its affairs.
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Yes, it's true, a few days ago the hapless Cat P did try to off Snake Z by poisoning his meal. But the cat failed to realize that snakes are immune to many types of poisons, and upon seeing the snake alive the next day, he suffered a heart attack. The other cats were beginning to write him off, but he was saved when Cat T administered mouth-to-mouth CPR; his heart recovered around a minute later.
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About a week ago, someone mailed Mr. Sparkles a package of roughly 50 assorted "Zhu Zhu" pets (we don't know who -- there was no name or return address on the package).
Mr. Sparkles had no use for the robotic toys, but he figured it might be of use to the bunny brigade, so he sent it up north to Samantha.
Samantha came up with the idea of using the Zhu Zhu pets as a decoy to launch a major operation against the neighborhood cat gang headquarters. While she knew it was unlikely she could occupy the headquarters for any length of time, she knew her saboteurs could inflict significant damage to the compound in a matter of minutes if she could somehow get most of the cats and other security forces out of the compound.
Samantha hired the black bunny squad to spray-paint a warning on the front door of the headquarters at night -- that the newly created 'fifty hamster heros' rebel group would attack Cat P's owner's house the following day at exactly 12pm noon.
The next day, Cat P and his trusted right-paw cat, Cat T, camped out at his house in order to repel the threatened attack. Cat P left (another) Cat named T (hereafter referred to as T2) in charge of the headquarters. Meanwhile, Samantha and a small team of bunnies set up the Zhu Zhu Pets on the sidewalk pointing towards Cat P's owner's house driveway.
About a minute later, the hamsters were making their characteristic noises and moving around randomly in Cat P's owner's driveway. Cat T noticed this and went to wake up Cat P, who upon being awoken and appraised of the situation, immediately phoned Cat T2 in a panic and told him the house was under attack by the hamster heroes and to rally up and send all the cats in order that the attackers could be killed for their insolence. As the commanding officer, T2 took control and ordered Cat P to stay inside and make sure none of the hamsters entered his owner's house through doors or windows. Then he marched out to Cat P's owner's house with every cat he could find, about thirty, in formation. In the meantime, Samantha and her team of bunnies had cleared out of the area.
The main force of bunnies was waiting at the border and started hopping at full speed toward the gang headquarters when their forward scouts reported Cat T2 and a large complement of cats marching out in the direction of Cat P's house. Cat T2, once he got near Cat P's owner's house, ordered his troops to create a perimeter around the house and then start closing in, killing any small animals that they came across in the process.
With Cat P holed up in his masters' house and unable to participate in the combat, things unsurprisingly went quite well for the cats at first. After a few minutes, the perimeter circle formed by the cats had closed to about a hundred feet, and the deaths of several feral rats and a stray bunny had been reported. At a neighbor's house, a dog barked incessantly, but the cats remained indifferent to him/her.
Meanwhile, a large force of almost 200 bunnies had reached the gang's headquarters, including 12 specially trained saboteurs who were adept at causing electronics to fail by chewing up wires, network cables, phone lines, power connections, etc.
The mass of bunnies quickly overwhelmed the few cats who were unlucky enough to have been left to guard the headquarters. In a matter of minutes, the specialists took nearly all of their communications equipment offline, causing the gang's website, online forums, and live chat to go offline. The mass of bunnies destroyed anything soft, or even slightly edible, inflicting about 400,000 carrots worth of damage to various furniture, building infrastructure, and the like. After several minutes, they quickly left.
The battle at Cat P's owner's house came to a head, as the cats had surrounded the mass of Zhu Zhu Pets and were within striking range. Spies report that the Zhu Zhu Pets did not attempt to defend themselves in any way, and the battle lasted about several seconds before Cat T2 recognized they had all been had and ordered his force to return to base.
What happened next is the matter of some debate, but according to Mikey's best reconstruction (from the reports of several spies and those who would defect in the next few days following the incident) -- Cat T2 radioed the cats that had been back at the base, and when he received no response, he knew he had to get back to the base as soon as possible. He spotted a nearby car and had his entire squad break in, shattering one of the back windows with a large rock before he used his expertise to hotwire the car and peel off. Driving for this group of cats was not the best, Cat T2 had taken the wheel while several cats floored the gas pedal with all their might. After running several red lights, they collided with a large SUV with a family of four in it.
Local small animals report that the scene caused 'quite a ruckus'. Cat T2 and several others had perished in the collision, while the family of four was 'mostly okay, just a little scratched up'.
When the cats finally did make it back to their headquarters, Cat P ran to his office and would not let anyone come in for several hours. Afterwards he announced that several cats had perished as a direct result of combat operations, and tried to use this to rally his troops behind him. However, it didn't help, and several days later, several prominent cats defected from the gang including Cat J.
Cat T2 was one of the few competent battlefield commanders left in the neighborhood cat gang. He perished at a rather young age of four and a half years.
Sindobook:
Yes, his defection is pretty recent (last few days), and Mikey's group has debriefed him in full.
From Mikey -- "There's no reason to doubt what he says."
You can read his public account, there's no reason for me to report anything else here.
From Tuan Tuan - "I guess this completes Cat F seizing of the gang's TV show -- if she still wants it, that is. With his defection, all her rivals have now been eliminated. And she did it without lifting a paw, if nothing else I have to complement her on that."
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One thing not mentioned is details behind the TV show. At first, the TV show was supposed to be a general informational type of thing. The gang wasn't supposed to be a major part of the content.
From another defector, cat U:
"Over the 12 years[1] the show ran, over time it became a centerpiece for gang publicity. Both Cat J and Cat Y fought against this, but honestly they could only do so much. In the beginning, the show was maybe 90% informational, now it is maybe 20% informational, if that. The show may be canceled altogether unless Cat P can find a suitable stooge to host it, now."
[1] Cat years, this is roughly 2 years in human terms.
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Cats and other animals near him now report that Cat P has 'gone bonkers...', as in completely lost it (mental).
"He thought he saw a rat. He called in Cat T, and Cat T played along to humor him. But it obvious to everyone there that there was no rat there. But it was the strangest thing. He was talking to the rat. Rather than catching it, or eating it. He thought the rat was his friend, and he was talking to it."
"A days after Cat T2 perished, he thought Cat F was Cat T2 for a whole hour. Cat J, who had not defected from the gang yet, tried to set him straight, but he persisted. About an hour later, he finally realized she wasn't him, and then abruptly started to come on to her (Cat F). He continued his unwelcome advances until she bit him in the nose. It was a really nasty bite, he had to get stitches."
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Mikey reports that intelligence now indicates the gang's factional infighting has come to a head -- things are moving toward an all-out 'turf war' between gang members.
"Cat J's defection has got the vanguard and most of the cats who get votes in the Kitty Caucus jumping up and down. Cat P has become extremely paranoid, locking himself in his office and not allowing any cats to see him other than Cat T and a few in the vanguard."
From Samantha - "Radio Traffic from the gang has dropped to nothing. It seems like they're using runners again for all types of communication. Infighting continues and seems to be escalating, but nothing too serious yet, still waiting for the opportune moment to attack."
Sindobook:
It's already been considered.
From Samantha (old quote -- months ago) -- "We thought about allying with C to fight the gang, but, honestly, we just don't trust him."
From Mr. Sparkles - "He's basically made himself a sworn enemy of the whole gang, all its factions. His understanding of intrigue is poor, and he doesn't understand 'divide and conquer'. He doesn't choose his battles judiciously, and he makes enemies unnecessarily."
From Tuan Tuan - "Honestly, C's forces are weak. The only thing they have going for them is morale. They're under-equipped and under-funded, and his operation runs a considerable deficit. Though, everything is relative. Financially, he's not a badly off as the gang. Not yet, at least."
Probably the red flag for this type of thing is how he makes enemies without reason. Not a good trait or one you'd want for a potential ally.
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I can't stop laughing at this one, it's a joke people, get over it!
Actually it is something of a debacle. It was suppose to be an 'april fools' type joke, but the Panda they put in charge has horrible vision. And he's so full of himself, he's delusional. When April Fools came around, he insisted it wasn't April first and refused to do the joke. But then when May 1st comes along, again he's now convinced it's April 1st so he did the joke that was originally planned for a month ago.
"He's one BAD Panda..." - Mr. Sparkles
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Alright I am getting too many calls on this.
According to Mikey, there is a minor thing going on in the local level.
But it's really just an attempt to "kill a bunch of birds with only one stone."
Let it play itself out, there is method to this 'madness'. The real war is being fought in the shadows.
From Tuan Tuan:
"There is a power grab going on, a lot of animals are trying to get their paws around as much grub as they can. The gang's upper echelon is crumbling, and all the cats and others are scrambling to see who will be the new 'top cat'."
"This puts creatures like the Snake (Z) in a very advantageous position. It allows the revolutionaries to go head to head with the loyalist faction, at least for the time being."
"And locally, it should push them over the edge. Which is honestly what we've been trying to do all along."
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I have been asked multiple times now, basically, "Why do [things] appear and disappear?"
It's not random. It's just a sign of the factions battling it out -- the conflict in the shadows. On a given day, one faction may be in control of the server, so they put all their propaganda up and silence the other factions. Then, the next day, another faction might gain control of the server, so they do the same. Whether it's the central server, the facebook page, the forums, the official e-mail address, etc., all these things are contested and control of them can change from one day to the next.
Sometimes it's a case of one cat who manages that item, and being recruited / coerced / bribed / etc. by one faction or another. Other times a cat perishes and is replaced, and there are some cases where multiple cats all have some partial control of the item and will battle it out day by day.
This kind of structure isn't at all unusual as far as groups of cats go, it's closer to the norm than not.
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It's because the snake is one of those 'rare cases', like a bear or mountain lion who has fed on people and developed a taste for (only) them, avoiding his standard diet of small animals in exchange for a diet consisting of other types of snakes.
Sindobook:
According to Tuan Tuan's acquaintance, Panda M, late this week and weekend (May 18th, May 19th, etc.) is when the meeting is planned.
From Tuan Tuan - "They couldn't have chosen a worst time. A more inconvenient one, that is."
"I'd expect a major house-cleaning. Major. Of course that's what's needed, much to the chagrin of (Panda) M and some of the other animals there. But a house-cleaning that comes from an outside source, it's likely to do more harm than good."
"The big question is, who's doing the house cleaning? Or who's going to show up? If it's Cat P and his lackeys, they better recognize this is hostile territory, and Mikey's no slouch, even without the bunny brigade. If it's someone like Cat K, he might be able to talk his way post the local security forces, but he's virtually unknown in these parts and isn't likely to be well received either. Only someone like the snake has a chance of both pulling off the thorough house cleaning that needs to be done, and not causing an outright revolt. But would they send him? I wouldn't count on it, really."
Note: You can check the facebook page. It's something like Saturday at 4pm.
"...Crescent room on the Regency Ballroom side of the property (which is on the side we were on year 2) This meeting is on Saturday the 19th starting at 4PM. Parking will be free if you let the hotel know you were at the..."
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Reports are that Cat P's owner dropped off his "napper" cat bed in the gang's headquarters, and Cat P basically lives there now. He disappeared into his office, and no one has seen or heard from heard from him in almost a week.
From Samantha: "Things have been real quiet lately. By the look of it, everything's at a standstill."
"According to the last defector we spoke to, two days ago, the door to Cat P's room had been closed for several days, and no one had seen him or heard anything from him. Without their leader, the vanguard is paralyzed, and the warring factions are at a standoff."
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